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The Trouble With Identification

April 13, 2012

(Thanks @Alyssa Del Rosario and @tfor2and2fort for the inspiration)  When “identifying” with peoples’ personality, their character, their spirits, that’s connecting with them, right? That’s the feeling that most of us have gotten when getting to know people, so it’s easy to get caught up in the trap of identification. Identification breeds a spirit of separateness. It feels like connecting, but the karmic price is prejudice. you appreciate their energy less, because you mistake it for characteristics you mistakenly associate with that energy. Identification is the origin of all misunderstandings.

@tfor2and2fort “Yes, I always identify with others. I thought thats what connecting was… However once I see that you say it separates us I can understand that because I feel Isolated when i do compare my self to those perceived characteristics of others. I need to realign my perceptions”

Here is an example of my own experience with the tragic misunderstandings that identifications cause:

I have a friend who despite reading a great deal (huge amounts) of my writing, completely misunderstood me in the worst ways possible. It was devastating to me, I felt like giving up writing, because I had hoped that by communicating my thoughts completely candidly and with utmost care, and comprehensively converting my entire being into literary form, they could understand me. So with all the reading they did about me, they seemed to misunderstand me more and more.

I became convinced that in many cases, complete honestly can be the greatest deception, because it creates all these misunderstandings. But now I realize the link between that and something else they’ve told me. they have said a few times that their biggest vulnerability is that they “identify” with people they care about a lot. I didn’t understand how if they could misunderstand me so much if they cared so much, but now I understand they misunderstood precisely because they identify too much 

When I believed in identification, I had a very negative opinion of myself, and always suffered from self-sabotage motivated by a deep-seated self-loathing and mistrust. The way I started valuing myself, ironic as it might seem, is to stop identifying with myself. Most people also smoke/get addicted because they identify, by the way. I cannot get addicted to *anything*, because I don’t identify. It’s the perfect solution to most problems, believe it or not.

My friend Alyssa Del Rosario helped me realize the importance of identification, by telling me how great it was I didn’t identify like most people do. I knew I didn’t identify, but for me it was a natural part of life and I saw it as a bad thing (antisocial and attached), when really it was the opposite. I will always be grateful to her for helping me to realize the most important things in life, and in my journey towards Oneness

Connecting with people, the world, reality, and God without the deception of identification, is the first stage to realizing Oneness and Selfless love; elimination of identification is so crucial that it’s prerequisite to Oneness.  That’s how you transcend the paralyzing effects of your Ego, and realize Oneness with God, with the All, with You 🙂

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