Skip to content


October 18, 2010

I am one of the smartest, most talented, and blessed people on the face of this earth. For one reason or another, I have against the odds emerged from a troubling past and crippling environment more alive than ever before, as even Death itself can only make me stronger. I have the potential to become God, or the very least a powerful leader; one of those few geniuses that only come once thousand years. Perhaps most of those statements are shitting hubris, but one thing is certain: I can be a lot more than I am making myself to be at this very moment. Why am I not out there performing miracles right now, making use of my incredible insights and breathtaking wit to revolutionize the world, like I know very well I have the potential to do? It’s because I’ve been overly concerned with “playing it safe”; afraid that I will somehow take things too far and screw myself over, I opt to settle with “good enough”. What I need right now though, if I am to accomplish the greatness I am more than capable of, is a little bit more radicality. What I need is to take life a bit more seriously, and start taking care of business!

Being radical has always been a bit difficult for me, as my entire life I’ve been the sort of laid-back, go with the flow type guy. People act, and I react. I am who people think I am, and how others perceive my actions determines how I perceive myself. This isn’t so different from how most people perceive reality, but it is different from how I see things now. Because my sense of reality has changed (I no longer associate consensus reality as being my reality), I have unwittingly become at odds with myself. While my personality remains “I don’t care either way”, a go-with-the-flow type demeanor, my beliefs have become radical, idealistic, and revolutionary in nature. This is not a good thing, and a conflicted personality and beliefs will only send mixed messages and cause misunderstandings. To correct this, I’m going to have to step outside of my comfort zone, and take some risks in life!

Risk is not something I enjoy having. I have made the effort to ensure that my life remains risk-free, so that I don’t have to worry about taking risks, but admittedly utilizing defense mechanisms of this nature can only breed denial, deception, and a life wrought of illusion and detachment. While it’s quite interesting to think of myself as “in the world but not of it”, such a mindset does not reflect the real world, nor even a delusionary one; it is nothing but wishful thinking, and no good can come from it. To project such a level of detachment reflects not love, but fear, and it is this fear that isolates me from the world. I fear being corrupted, and so it is that the risk of being corrupted prevents me form truly living and experiencing life.

If I am to live up to my potential, achieve greatness, and in doing so experience the magnificence and beauty that is life, I must tread upon the corruption, and through my faith in myself and in the innate Beauty of this world, rise above it. Because I know what Beauty is, and what Love is, I cannot be spoiled by mere corruption. My Love for the world will itself protect me from it, for where some may see wickedness, I will have the privilege of witnessing Beauty; where others might only see naivety, I will see an innocent love. Just as Jesus was able to dine and converse with sinners without being corrupted, so should I have faith in my inner purity, and welcome the corruption of the world as a challenge rather than as a risk; a challenge which I am more than equipped to surpass with flying colors.

No comments yet

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: