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Striking the Balance

June 9, 2010

In my life, there have always been two passions: creativity and academics. From a young age, I would enjoy education more than anything, taking pride in every “A”, and excelling at everything I set my mind to. But I also enjoyed every form of creativity that I knew of: singing, playing instruments, painting, sketching, poetry, and fiction.

If I could live a fulfilling life in both of these pursuits, I would truly be a happy man. But that is where the dilemma lies: to perfect my pursuit of both creativity and academics, I need to find where to “strike the balance” between the two.

That’s really what it’s about: Balance.

See, I’m an obsessive-type person, so moderation is not a concept I am very acquainted with. It’s hard to balance anything– I am quite inempt when it comes to this thing called “priorizing”.

So as a result, I’ve been struggling (and so far failing) to find this elusive Balance in my life for the past couple years or so. I’ve come quite far in this regard, but have yet to demonstrate any progress worth talking about, but as I know that I will get this, I’m just going to have to persevere.

I’m going to start going to college again soon (in less than a couple weeks!), and I need to work on prioritizing while taking classes– my personal success depends on it! I need to start building strong living habits, so that when I’m lacking emotionally, I’ll still be able to go through the “motions” in the mean time. A life where I’m only productive “when I feel like it” isn’t a life worth living, after all.

I have for me one trump card in regards to “striking the balance”: Sublimation.

To clarify: I noticed than when I am depressed, I am more creatively inclined, and that when I am manic, I am more academically inclined. Curiosities aside, these bipolar anomalies will prove very useful in regards to channeling both of these strengths into a lifestyle in which Balance can be achieved with very little compromise. (I hate compromise, as you should know by now!)

Thus, by leveraging these mood shifts, I can achieve “the best of both worlds”. When I am manic, I will sublimate the excess “positive” energy into my studies, and when I’m depressed, I can sublimate the excess “negative” energy into creative pursuits. Because I am far more creative when depressed, and far more academic when I am manic, This solution covers all of the bases, resulting in much greater efficiency!

For the Record: I’m depressed right now, which is why that I’m writing!

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